Receiving A Gift

Believing is receiving?

God’s blessings, are hard to believe,
I am never worthy of His gifts.
Never, ever will I be worthy to receive salvation.
Love so amazing. 
In humility I accept, I believe, I receive.
A gift.
Forever I live ........inYour debt.
Forever I will thank You.
Undeserving, unworthy, often ungrateful.
You patiently lift me out of my failures, wash me off, and set me back on the Way of Life.
Patient, gracious.
Love is patient....Love is kind......God is Love........
Looking through the eyes of grace.

Love dripping like dew on a single blade of grass in the early autumn stillness of the morning. Each blade.

Each human heart.

 Receiving is believing?
What if the gift is so great it hurts to believe?
Yet all the while all around the gift is given and I am receiving.

I choose to believe, I choose to fully receive……

I have recently had a prayer answered affirmatively that honestly, all those times I dropped to my knees, full of anguish in fragile heart, lonely and alone, never really believed would happen. A longing faithless begging prayer.

Back in January when I drew that circle around  my heart, my life, one of the biggest things I let go of was moving from Alaska to be closer to my sister and her family. I very intentionally opened my heart,my hands and released........ my longing to a loving Father that I trusted. I made a very definite decision to trust what He had for my life. Even if it meant never living on this earth with my sister. I had heaven to look forward to and phone calls and pictures on Facebook. And that would be enough. Only to live my short life fully for Jesus. He became the most important and I let go of the rest, leaving it to Him to do with as He pleased.


~   ~   ~

Seven months into this adventure, sipping coffee in early morning stillness, I spoke words I had never known. In the stillness, in the quiet morning sunrise, the Son of Righteousness began to rise in my heart in a new way. Filling my heart with a Love I had never felt.

I spoke.

I am committed to this place, these people.
These are my people. 
I love this community and these people. 
I belong here. 
God wants me here. 
I am here because of these people. 
He loves these people. 
He loves these people through me. 
I am COMMITTED to this place.

That very same day like the sun shining so bright that it hurts your eyes, squinting, I received what I never really believed. The phone rang with a resounding YES! My sister, "we are moving to Alaska!"

We. Are. Moving. To. Alaska.
God is giving us the gift of life together!
The prayer, long standing longing of my human heart.
Whoever loses his life for My sake shall find it? (Mathew 16:25)
Answered with a yes?

It is happening.
My sister is here! With her family she lives here now.
Please take my unbelieving heart away, so that I might FULLY receive this gift.

cousin LOVE

This blessedness leads me to a lot of pondering, musing and wondering awe. God is good. God is and was always good. When I drew that circle, stepped in, let go and let God, I wasn't expecting this.

The longings of my heart. The deep loneliness that I have lived in for so many years is being filled.

Lose your life and you shall find it? This life that I am finding is truly abundantly more than I ever dreamed. Giving up all that I once held so dear, letting it all go for the sake of following Jesus. Living out Christianity. Not knowing what the future holds, totally surrendered to God. Abundant life is life in the spirit regardless of outward circumstances. I know this and I have lived it.

This recent blessing is a gift. The overflowing abundant nature of God's goodness.  A testimony to what can happen when we commit our works to the Lord and He establishes our plans.
Proverbs 16:3

Abundant Life

A gift.

Only believe.

Believe in the Lord Jesus and you shall be saved.
Acts 16:31

The simplicity of devotion to Christ.

Abundant life – in your spirit, in your soul – Zoë
All of the highest and best which Christ is. Which He gives to the saints. The highest blessedness of the creature.


Now. Abundant life. Available now. To all who believe, receive.

So you see, stepping into that circle of chalk around my
heart made life lived.
 Heart made full life lived.

Abundant life
Letting go of my way
There is a way which seems right unto a man, but its end is death.
Proverbs 16:25
Letting go of death, completely, and receiving life

Choose this day, whom you will serve…Joshua 24:15
I have put life and death before you….Deuteronomy 30:19

And the life
So much more than I have ever known.
Who is able to give abundantly more than you could ask or think
Exceedingly above the greatest abundance, super abundantly, over and above,
according to the power that works within you.
Ephesians 3:20

The power that works within you.
in that circle
in that heart
in that life
at the very center
working within
quietly, silently, working

Life abundant
Old things passing away, being made new.
The newness of life
in me.
I bow….my head, my heart, my life, my all.
So much more than I could ever ask or think.
God is gracious – God is generous – God is blessing
in the spirit, in the soul.

Abundant life

He is no respecter of persons
He offers to all
He came for all
John 10:10

The circumstances of life in this fallen flawed world.
It may be all that we can do to hold on, yet…
Jesus is the anchor of our souls. Hebrews 6:19

Abundant life lived out is in the spirit, in the soul.
Making dry ground a stream in the desert.

Living Water rising up from within…
Living the abundant life
in the spirit
in the soul man
in the very heart.

Though the outer man is perishing, the inner man is being renewed, day by day.
2Corinthians 4:16

 Abundant Zoë

Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of Lights.
James 1:17

Living today, thankfully in awe,



tracy dixon said…
"Living out Christianity. Not knowing what the future holds, totally surrendered to God."

This is what we all need to remember. What I am being reminded of is that we are not promised happiness here on earth but peace. We have a duty every moment of everyday. Who has God placed in our lives today? Who did I pass by today that needed to see Jesus through me and I wasted that opportunity? Take that opportunity, don't waste it. We aren't promised tomorrow and we aren't promised to be surrounded by pleasant people that make us happy and agree with everything we say or do. We need to be filled with His love so we can share that love with the unlovable.

Jesus prays in John 17 for us saying "May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me."
and also he prays "I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them."

If I look back 2 months ago and tried to guess what my life would be like today, I never would have guessed it. It's been hard but I see His hand at work in everything that has happened. It is for His glory, not mine. I trust Him with my life, but can no longer have the attitude of boasting, "I will go to Haiti and He will keep my family safe." because my days on earth and my family and friends days on earth are in His hands. He knew our last day here before the foundation of the earth. So how can I boast? This past month has taught me something very important. He is God! and I am not, no matter how much I think I have control over things. And to take opportunities everyday, one day at a time... no more boasting or worrying about tomorrow.
reneeannpierce said…
Tracy, I have often pondered what you are expressing. I have the words 'He gives and He takes away' running through my mind today. Right now, I am experiencing a great abundant blessing from the Lord, yet I know that even when the clouds hide His brilliance, He is there and He is still in control. I recently wrote about what you are saying,
Being fully alive requires rapt attention to life now.
Living for Jesus, Today, is what it's all about!

In grace,
tracy dixon said…
Thanks Renee... I like this that you said in that post "Live your life in such a way today that tomorrow you will have no regrets."

I am seeing things through new eyes at the moment, through this new pain yet at the same time joy that I've never experienced before. It's so hard to explain. But I've had a revelation, a new awakening, a new seriousness about my faith that I've never had before... a true reality check. I've experienced the death of loved ones but no one that I can say for certain I know that they are with the Lord. But I know where my dear friend Pat is. It is an amazing thought yet she had so much vision, so much faith, so much grace... I've never met anyone ever that literally saw unlovely people with the true compassion of Christ.
Cherry said…
Linking up after you at Multitudes on Mondays - isn't it amazing how God gives us the desires of our hearts? I enjoyed reading about your special gift recently, of having your sister move to Alaska! And in the midst of the trusting and the waiting, God gives us our biggest desire of being drawn closer to His heart.

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