Your royal husband delights in your beauty…………
I read this passage early this morning and I felt anything but beautiful. I profess to believe the Bible is the word of God, inspired by the Holy Spirit, every word true. But do I really believe? Do I really believe that I am loved? Cherished? That God delights in me? If every word of God is true, and believing that, believing God, who cannot lie, is the faith I profess, then I need to accept this truth about myself. God delights in me. God thinks I’m lovely. He sees me as beautiful.
On a lighter note, I am getting ready to leave my family for two weeks. How do I feel about this? At first I didn’t realize how long I was going to be gone, then I started panicking slightly, because two weeks is a long time to be without any of my children. So I started praying for the Lord to prepare my heart. Now? I am starting to get excited and I am starting to think about and prepare my time away. It is amazing! God is amazing. He is wondrous. His Holy Spirit is marvelous. I marvel every time I realize him working in my life.
The thing is, if I would just pray more, and be less independent, I could live in a constant state of marvel and thankfulness. The truth is, He is tirelessly working on my behalf, helping me in so many ways. When I spend my time worrying and fretting, I am only wasting my precious limited time on this earth. Jesus is here, Jesus is now, and he gave us his Holy Spirit to be our helper, today. The Holy Spirit has come. I am born again, by the Spirit of God. It is my birthright to live in the council of the Holy Spirit of God. I don’t need to fret. Worry is NEVER necessary. Prayer is ALWAYS necessary. It is by prayer that I am transformed. It is by casting my cares, my anxieties, my worries all upon Jesus, that I am renewed.
My worries and fretting and second-guessing about my upcoming trip did nothing positive toward the end result of my travel. But when I began to pray and cast all of my concerns on God, somehow it all changed. And that is the tension we as Christians live in. Philippians 4:6-7 has been my companion for many years; in many different scary circumstances I have prayed these words. These words brought me through the fear of childbirth, through the fear of flying, through rough patches in my marriage, through the long days of motherhood. Many, many times I have read these words as a mother, believed them and done them and God has seen me through one more day in the trenches of motherhood. Let me be honest here, just because I have a lot of kids, this does not mean that I have any more patience than you, who maybe has just two children. No, we are the same. I am not a ‘super mom’ or any such thing. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids with all that my heart can contain. Motherhood has been an awesome experience, most of the time. I don’t think I ever would have realized the capacity the human heart has to love if I didn’t always have enough love for one more. But, loving your children doesn’t make the exhaustion of motherhood any less exhausting.
I guess if I had to choose a portion of scripture that has influenced me the most, these words right here would be it. Reading, believing and obeying these words have changed my life. Changed the course of my life.
Don't worry about anything;
pray about everything.
Tell God what you need,
and thank him for all he has done.
you will experience God's peace,
which exceeds anything we can understand.
His peace will guard your hearts and minds
as you live in Christ Jesus.
And so as I prepare to go to my first ever writers conference (!!!!!!!) (Faith + Culture ) I am again strapping these verses on to my thigh. These are my sword.
Pray for me?